Thursday, January 30, 2014

My Thursday Thoughts....Brace Yourselves for This One

This week's Thinking Out Loud may be a little chaotic/psychotic/hyperbolic (just kidding on the last one...I needed another "ic" word and that's all that came to mind) in nature... for those who read my ramblings regularly, you know that I am freshly into this whole dating thing, and I'm fresh off a first date that I thought went well, but obviously I know nothing about men (see previous post regarding this topic).

This is what's occupying my mind this week...I'm including things that I'm digging and things that piss me off....that's a good mix, no?

Things that I'm digging:

 - My breakfast today....seriously, it was super yum.  Farm eggs, grilled roma tomatoes, home made guacamole all on a grilled tortilla...mmmm



  - Ok, this is more of an on-going addiction.  My lip glosses from Bath and Bodyworks.  I LOVE these things.  This is the collection that I have just in my purse!  I have more tucked away for future needs.  I have a problem, I know.  You should see my insane collection of Lip Smackers.


 - This totally great DuckTape that I purchased from Michaels yesterday.  Is it not the coolest???  I'm doing my 2014 vision board and wanted something cool for the trim....et voila!!


 - the number eleventy-seven.  If you do nothing else today, please use this at some point.  I love this.  Example: "Girls, I have told you eleventy-seven times to clean your rooms!"  ha!  Brilliant.   Its a perfect balance of silly and totally sarcastic....right up my alley.

 - One Direction.  Yes, I love them.  I am the mom of two teen girls who adore them...it's only natural that I would love them too.  But really, I do love their music.  I've seen their movie eleventy-seven times. (see what I did there??)  I have a few of my favorite songs of theirs on my shower playlist. (come on...we all have a shower play list).

 - as an appendix of my above, specifically, I have a major thing for Harry Styles.  I can't help it.  My subconscious wants me to!!  I literally have a recurring dream that he and I are an item.  Yes, I am Mrs. Robinson.  Nice to meet you.  But he is adorable....


Now  for the things that piss me off....

- Winter.  Actually, it's not that I HATE Winter...I hate the ice and walking like my knees are tied together so I don't fall on my ass.  I hate the minus eleventy-seven wind-chill (again!!), that makes it too damn cold to even go and play in the snow.

- Stupidmenwhogetyourhopesupandwhoseemlikereallygreatguysonlytoprovetheopposite.  I am NOT a man basher and have no tolerance for women who are, but for the love of all things holy....why are some of them such .... boys?????  I have been chatting with a great guy for almost two weeks now.  We were both digging each other.  We had the first date yesterday.  It went, in my opinion, great.  Well, he practically sprinted away after without a hug, handshake or even a friendly punch on the arm.  THEN, I haven't heard a word from him since.  I texted him to say thank you for lunch - he said he enjoyed it and that is it.  My male friends are pissed that HE didn't message me first to say that - good point.  Plus, can I really be that clueless in thinking that it went well when he is thinking the opposite?  I am disappointed, yes, he was a cool guy...but more than that, I'm totally perplexed.   Can we all say....SIGNIFICANTLY DOUCHIER!!

- Doctors who think they are the shit.  I had a run-in with a doctor this week.  He was a fill-in in our local clinic.  We had never met before.  I can't decide if I like him or loathe him.  First of all, I was there to get my blood pressure prescription renewed.  I told him that I was not happy about being on it for six years already. He said that was the norm so get used to it.  Huh?  Seriously??  Then he told me that "All yoga does is stretch you out and make you look silly."  EXCUSE ME???  Am I on tv here??  Is Ashton going to come out and tell me I'm being Punk'd??  He then admitted that no, he'd never actually TRIED yoga.  Ass.  Oh then, he insinuated that if I wasn't planning on being single forever, then I need to lose weight.  I'm not even kidding here folks.  The guy was an ass to the "nth" degree.

That's all I have for this week.  It's a trip being me.  haha!!


Go check out this blog too, wouldya....the link is at the top of this post. For those that visit me from there - thank you for stopping by and showing me some love!!!


Tuesday, January 28, 2014

Online Dating - As Seen By A (relatively) Normal Woman

This online dating gig is great fodder for writing.  My Twitter is full of the trials and tribulations, all with a witty hashtag (#myonlinedatingprobs).  I have been "at it" for just shy of two months now.  It is NOT for the faint of heart.  But, let's face it, in some cases, what options do we have?  In my case, I live in the middle of nowhere, work from home, and am a full-time mom.   A lot of us are 40-somethings looking to start Chapter 2.  Things are wayyyyyy different now than they were when we were bright-eyed 20-somethings.  Well, to a degree, things are different.  Most of us have kids and careers now which we are dividing our time between....some are jaded, some are still hopeful...some are still little boys trying to see up the girls' skirts....and from what I hear from my male friends, some are still the high school girls thinking they rule the students' union.  That is the one thing that has struck me the most about being "out there" again....really, only the numbers in our ages have changed.  We are all still trying to navigate our way through life.  Some are still terribly awkward, others seem to have somewhat of a grasp on it, but when it comes right down to it, we are all wanting to be loved and wanted by someone.

Anyways....I have realized that men still need (and in some cases want) things spelled out for them.  Maybe women do to, I can only speak for myself - and yes, I do expect men to say what they mean and mean what they say!  It's not rocket science here folks...
I have put together a reference list for men when it comes to online dating....take it with a grain of salt...and a shot of tequila, and you'll be good:

The Profile:
Oh boy....yes, I have touched on this before...but truly, you have no idea what they are like.  Some, are great - funny, insightful, great pics...others...sweet Mother of God...it's no wonder you're single buddy.

1. The photo - let's face it...this is the drawing card. Period.  I'm not going to blow smoke up your ass and say otherwise.  Put a photo up.  Otherwise, you look like you're just trying to hide something.

  •  please try to avoid the mirror selfie - granted, some are good and it's a good way to get a body shot, but for the most part - no.  Just, no.
  •  if you are doing said bathroom selfie, do not, I repeat, do NOT post one that has the toilet or      urinal in the background.  Yes, I have seen these.  PASS.
  •  another faux pas are the department store changing room selfies.  *sigh* Really??
  •  and please, PLEASE, make sure it's a recent photo.  Nothing is worse than thinking you're                  meeting one person, only to have what looks like his grandfather, show up.  We want today's look - what do you look like now.

2. The headline - this is a tough one.  For me, it's hard to come up with a catchy one-liner, although I have seen some great ones.  Make me giggle, that's a good start.
3. Do NOT have a list as long as my leg of all your activities.  Really.  I don't care.  And furthermore, if you are so busy doing all of this stuff, when in the hell are you going to have time for me??  Hmmm??
For me, it matters what you believe in, what you find amusing, and what you can't stand.
4. The "Looking For" box.....be honest in this one.  If you're just looking for a quick bang in the back seat of your Prius, then say so.  It pisses me off to see a man who says they are looking for a relationship, only to have them actually be looking for the exact opposite.  I give props to those who say they just want casual encounters...thanks for keeping it real boys!
5. The "within ___ miles of" box....*sigh*...I've mentioned this one before.  Don't say that you are looking for someone within 100 miles of city XYZ only to really mean that you really just want someone down the street.
Basically, it all boils down to keeping it real.  

Ok, so you've put your profile together...feeling good about it...time to get out there....
You are looking through all of the profiles of "matches"...hopefully reading them...and one catches your eye.  Oh damn...she doesn't work out eleventy-seven times a week, doesn't ski or climb mountains, drinks after work at a pub?? Nope.  GET REAL.  If you are my age, single, and online, you more than likely have kids, and are trying to raise them on a single income.  Personally, I used to do all of those fun, adventurous things...then I got married and became a mom.  That, in itself, is an adventure.  Now, as a single mom, it's an even bigger adventure.  The gym??  That's where I watch my kids play sports, right?  Skiing?  HAHA!  If I'm of the wealthy sort, sure!  Drinks after work at a pub??  Surely, you jest....Does it mean that I don't want to do all of these things again?  No!  But, life is happening...priorities are different....don't discount a woman because she doesn't tick all of your activity boxes.

1.  I cannot stress this enough....DON'T BE AFRAID TO MAKE THE FIRST MOVE!!  Maybe it's cool for young women now to ask men out first, but for the most part, we are all from the same generation, and for me, I am old fashioned and like the man to make the first move.  On one site, I have a man who comes and looks at my profile every second or third day.  I also go to his - he's a very good looking guy and I just like to look at good looking guys. (Woo!!  Take THAT womens' libbers!)  It's like a little game we have going now for almost two months....I'm dying to message him and say "are you going to just keep looking at me, or did you want to actually speak to me?", but out of pure principal, I haven't.

2.  Make sure you actually READ the woman's profile that you are messaging.  Although it's flattering that my photos alone reeled you in, you just look like an idiot when you are asking me things that are clearly stated right there in my profile.  Yes, this has happened more than once to me.  My favorite guys are the ones who message me with a witty reference to something in my profile.  Bonus points!

3.  It takes a lot of courage to put yourself out there and message someone - I totally acknowledge and appreciate that.  I reply to every single message I get - even if it's just to say thanks, but no thanks.  Men, speaking for myself, be a nice guy.  It floors me when men write on their profiles "just a nice guy looking for..." , then BE a nice guy.  Period.

4. This really shouldn't need to be said, but sadly, it seems it does.  Men, have your shit together.  If you are renting a room in someone else's house and can't have guests over, don't be online looking for a relationship.  Same goes if you are living in a RV only big enough for one - short - person.  Also, it helps if you have some sort of motorized vehicle.  I get it, a lot of us are starting over in one degree or another, but....

OK!!  Good job!!  You've been messaging a couple of days on the website...it's time to take it off-line.  Don't wait more than three days to do this.  Again, if you are hesitant to even give someone an email address then it sends the signal that you have something to hide.
So, now you're either emailing or texting, whatever you've decided upon.  Things are either moving along swimmingly, or they are not.  If it's going well, then say so!  If it's not, then please, say so.  No one likes to be strung along - and you'll likely get bonus points for being so honest!
When do you decide to meet in person?  I think that totally depends on the people involved.  When you know, you just know.  But, I'm fairly confident in saying that you will know within a week of first contact.  If you still are waffling, cut that fish loose and move on...we aren't getting any younger here.
So now, you've said you want to meet in person - speaking from myself, once this has been decided, don't wait forever, if it can be helped.  You might not have any chemistry in person, but maybe sparks will be flying all over the place!!  Either way, isn't it better to find out and move in the appropriate direction?

The First, In-Person, Meet:

If the woman is sane, she will expect the first meeting to be in a public place...someplace she feels safe, in case, you know...you're a freak.  Actually, I know of a woman who was assaulted on a first meeting, so this has some truth to it...mind you, she was not terribly smart and met at night, alone...*sigh*.  Moving on...
Now I'm on the fence about this...many people do not see this as a date.  Why isn't it?  I really don't understand the logic behind that.  I would call it a date.  And as such, and being the type of woman that I am, I would like a man to at least offer to pay.  **edited**  However, if I happen to ask the man on the first date, I think it's totally acceptable for ME to pay. If I met up with a guy and he expected me to pay for my own coffee, or whatever, and did not even offer...not exactly the best first impression.  To me, it shows the character and values of a man if he offers to pay, holds the door for me, whatever.  (again...take THAT women's libbers!!) Does that mean that I would expect everything to be paid for by him?  Definitely not!  However, first impressions do matter...and yes, that works both ways!
Be yourself.  Seriously. However, it stands to reason that we will be nervous.  Minor slip-ups are adorable and expected...MINOR slip-ups.  For instance, when I'm nervous, damn near anything could come out of my mouth, and likely will...I have a gift of saying stupid things at incredibly inappropriate times when I'm nervous.  But, at least try...chew with your mouth closed, don't slurp, mind your manners.  (I have a MAJOR issue with hearing people eat...no lie...that is a potential deal-breaker for me)

Now I want to say something here...and I hope that I get feedback on it.  To me, personally, if I'm at the point with someone that we are getting ready for the first date, I am not chatting online with other men.  I believe in giving something a good, sporting try.  This seems to be where I differ from others.  I have had circumstances where things have been moving along swimmingly, and all of a sudden - BAM.  "Oh, I've met someone, we are going to give it a try!"....um....excuse me?  I thought you and I were just getting the ball rolling here.  I find it exceedingly rude and disrespectful that this happens.  To me, a man that is chatting me up, and is getting set to meet me, yet is still online fishing, is not even serious about any possibility of things happening with me.  Period.  Will every date turn into a relationship?  Hell no!  But, at least, give it a fair chance.  OR, be honest and say that you are still playing the proverbial field.

After that first date...well, it evolves as it should from there.  Either way.  If you had a great time - say so!  If you don't see it working - say so!  But have fun, and look at it for the experience that it is.

I hope this sheds some light on things for any men reading.  My men-folk are always telling me that they need stuff spelled right out for them, so here it is.  Print it off, laminate it, and carry it with you if you are in the ever-adventurous world of online dating.  Or whatever.

Thursday, January 23, 2014

Thursday's Ramblings

Wow, two posts in a row!!  I'm on fiyah!!  Truth be told, I've got some pretty cool things going on in my life right now, which means I have a LOT rattling around in my head.

I took part in my first Thinking Out Loud Thursday a couple of weeks ago and thought today would be another great opportunity to do it again.

I think, rather than this be about me thinking out loud, it will be about me laughing out loud...I want to talk about things that crack me up.  I laugh.  A lot.  I love to make people laugh and I love, love, love being around those who can make me throw my head back and laugh right out loud.  Here are some things that are tickling my funny bone as of late:

1.  "Shit just got real" - this just makes me giggle.  This is a line from Bad Boys 2, which was forever ago, but thanks to Tumblr and Pinterest it has become a tag line on some seriously funny pics....Case in point:
This pic is so perfect for so many reasons....Usain Bolt for one (thank you God for that beautiful Jamaican man) and Forest Gump...come onnnnnnnnnnnnn that is some funny shit right there!!

2. The 21st century usage of the word "douche".  Dear God this makes me laugh.  The Urban Dictionary defines douche like this: a word to describe an individual who has shown themself to be very brainless in one way or another, thus comparing them to the cleansing product for vaginas. 
HAHAHAHAHA!!!  It seems to be the general consensus that men who wear white rimmed sunglasses are significantly douchier than those who don't.  Let's all just take a moment and appreciate the fact that I also just used my new favorite phrase - "significantly douchier" in a sentence.....
Now to be fair, I LOVE a good man-bod...but this guy, with the hair gel, and the fake tan and the white-rimmed glasses...no gracias...Jersey Shore called...just sayin'.

3.  Scaring the crap out of cats.  Yes, sometimes (well, most times) the little devil on my shoulder drowns out the little angel.  We have two cats in our house, and I just cannot help myself.  When they see something that they have no idea what it is and are sneaking up, all my brain sees is an opportunity for mirth and merriment. Admittedly, every morning when I grind up my flax seed for my smoothie, I wait until our kitten is not looking, then I buzz it and laugh hysterically as she does the Fred Flintstone out of the kitchen and down the hall.  Yes, I'm an ass.  It's not just the live performances either.  Videos of cats also get me laughing so hard that I end up crying.  Maybe it's not just scaring...cats are just funny as hell...dress one up and watch it try to walk and you will know what I'm saying.


4. My oldest daughter.  I am so crazy in love with both of my girls, but this one...oh how we laugh.  She is almost 15 - she has my sense of humor (thank God), and we find the most ridiculous and often inappropriate things funny.  Our days are filled with random texts and photo messages that have cracked us up.



5. Head, gut or groin.  We are all familiar with the game on AFV.  This is obviously a universal source of hilarity.  I just cannot contain myself when I see these things happening in front of me, I'm sorry.  Yes, I do care if you are alright, but just let me compose myself first!  This little clip combines this AND my favorite tv show, Modern Family: 







6.  Speaking of Modern Family...oh how I love that show.  Thank you syndication!!  Every single episode makes me literally laugh out loud.

So there you have it...these are just a few of the things that crack me up lately.  Don't ever pass up the chance to laugh right out loud!!  Well, except at a funeral....that just ain't right...

Wednesday, January 22, 2014

Everything That I Know For Sure About Men



.........


Well, clearly I know nothing about them.  I always thought that women were the more complex of the sexes, and yes, God love us, we love to complicate things, but sheesh, men...what the hell are they thinking???

I dove back into the online dating pond a month ago.  I realized that I did not give it a real try last time.  I didn't post any photos of me, my profiles were sarcastic and angry, and I gave up in a hurry.  So, a month ago I signed up again...better attitude, photos, gentler profile.  The results have honestly been staggering.  I get messaged daily - granted 80% of them I am not interested in at all, but let's cut the crap - who doesn't like that kind of attention?

Through this process, I have observed a few things about men nowadays:


  • They are unwilling to leave the city limits.  Seriously.  I have actually had men go out of their way to message me to say "It's too bad you live so far away."  Have we become such a society of convenience that the idea of driving for an hour to meet a potential mate is so unfathomable?  
  • Chivalry is, it seems, dead.  This goes hand-in-hand with the above.  What happened to men woo-ing women?  Making a little effort?  I'm all for meeting halfway, but I believe the initial effort should be made by the man.  I have a male friend who is also elbows-deep into this online dating thing.  He has been divorced for 5 years now and is terribly miserable.  All he wants is to meet someone.  He recently told me that he has been chatting with a woman from Fernie but that it's "a little far".  I basically ripped him a new one.  I said, "So basically, you want a relationship, but only if it falls in your lap and requires no effort from you whatsoever..."  He actually had the nerve to tell me, "It works both ways!"  I told him to grow a pair and to do something to keep chivalry alive.  Yep, I'm a good friend. 
  • Even though most of them act as though they have it all together, they are really still teenagers trapped in a 40-something's body.  They like boobs, cars, and boobs in cars.  I actually chatted with a guy online who's headline said "Must have food, boobs, and brains"..he later admitted that he really could care less about the brains...or the food....LOL
  • I have no idea, really, what they are thinking....do they want us to message them first?  Do they think about us throughout the day?  Wonder what it would be like to kiss us?  We all know they are trying to imagine us naked....
If any of you follow me on Twitter you will know the freak-show that I have encountered during this process.  Men (boys) from ages 19-63, a cross-dresser, tattooed face guy (he assures that yes, there is a story behind it.....whew!  Cuz that makes it ok...), couples looking to add a third...seriously, I can't make this shit up.  But once in a while, a face and profile will jump out at me and I take a chance and message them.  In doing this I have been blocked (seriously buddy?), politely brushed-off, ignored, propositioned, and in a couple of instances, actual conversation ensues.  I guess those rose-colored glasses of mine pay off once in a while.
I'm not sure that I will meet my Mr. Right For Me this way, but who knows??  I'm definitely having fun in the meantime.
I'm still in the dark about the male species....but it's more fun to feel your way around sometimes, isn't it. ;0)

Thursday, January 2, 2014

Thinking Out Loud

Well thank you to Jo over at Living Mint Green, I have discovered a new Thursday delight, Thinking Out Loud over at Running With Spoons.  I love to think out loud, and it's fun to list random thoughts...
Here are mine for today:

- this is Ella.  Quite possibly the CUTEST cat on the planet.  She is adorable, hilarious, and a bane of our older cat's existence.  Today she thought she'd check out my office garbage.

- Simply Yoga....this is a free app that has changed my life and rocked my world.  There are three different sessions; 20, 40, or 60 minutes.  I love this app...

- Deepak Chopra's 21 Day Meditation Challenges....these have also changed my life.  Over Christmas I received three free mediations but the challenges in their entirety are available for purchase...you can download and stream them or buy the cd sets.

- I'm a Netflix junkie.  I have devoured entire series and watched a few good  movies on here.  My latest addiction is Weeds....definitely not for the faint of heart, but it cracks me up and I'm totally hooked.

- my Cinnabon coffee creamer....oh how I love this!!  No, I don't want to know how bad it is for me.  I usually only have one coffee a day so I'm good, thanks.

This is my first post composed on my iPhone...I think it went pretty well!!!
Head on over and check out the other blogs mentioned in this post...tell 'me I sent ya!


Tuesday, December 31, 2013

My Wishes For My Friends, And A Look Back at 2013

*This is a note that I wrote for Facebook today, and I wanted to share it here as well:

Today is a day that I am truly enjoying.  I have chosen to be as present as I can for every moment today and to take a good look at the year that is coming to a close tonight.  For anyone who knows even the slightest about me, you will of course, know that I have a lot on my mind today....writing is my release, and the best way that I know how to share all that I can and all that I am with those in my life - both near and far.

On this day, I find that I am filled with wishes for everyone, not merely myself...tomorrow marks the start of a brand new year.  An opportunity.  A clean slate.  A chance to write a whole new chapter or two in the story of our lives....to that end, my first wish...
  • I wish for you all, courage.  The kind of quiet courage, that maybe won't get you noticed in the newspapers, but will allow you to be true to yourself.
  • I wish for you, stillness and quiet.  Stop the glorification of busy, turn the world off and just be with your thoughts.  Slow down and listen.  
  • I wish for you, accountability.  This is a huge one.  Everyone makes choices....EVERYONE.  Good people make bad choices sometimes, yes, but it is the better person who takes accountability of their own role in things.  Learn, and move forward.
  • I wish for you, love.  Yes, for others, but mostly of yourself.  When you truly love yourself, then, and only then, are you able to give love freely to others.

This year for me has been amazing.  I would not change a single thing.  Has it been all roses and sunshine?  No, it certainly hasn't, but for the first time in my life, I felt like a participant in my life, not an observer.   I want to be able to look back on my life, each year, and be able to see the chances I took...the words that I didn't keep unspoken...the lessons that I learned.

In 2013 I reconnected with me.  Jodi.  I forgot how much I liked her.
I stepped wayyyy out of my comfort zone and travelled half way across the world by myself - TWICE!  I made amazing friends, ate delicious food, danced to new music.  I swam in the warm Caribbean sea just after sunrise...I rationalized with fishermen on the beach...I stayed in a board house with no running water...I was welcomed into a family who forever changed my life, and experienced a culture that I am privileged to have been included in.
I worked hard and was rewarded for it.  I volunteered and cried with strangers.
I said good-bye to my beautiful four-legged girl, and shared that grief with all who have loved and lost furred kids of their own.
I raged and rationalized.  I drank too much rum.  I cried so many times that I thought there would be no tears left ever.  I learned just how amazing my two daughters are.  They shared their own strength and wisdom with me, and we are strong, and will be just fine.
I have reconnected with those I lost touch with...made new connections with others...and shared parts of my self with those who will appreciate and reciprocate.
I even went on a date!
I love my life.  I am grateful for everything that has happened in my life - both good and bad for it has brought me to this amazing place.
I look back on 2013 with pride and look forward to 2014 with excitement.  I intend to push my own limits, step outside of my comfort zone, and become a better version of myself.  My authentic me.  My final wish for you all is that you choose to do the same....

Tuesday, December 24, 2013

Christmas Eve 2013



It's 9:47 on the morning of Christmas Eve.  I've been awake since 5am - thanks internal alarm.  My daughters have been up since 7.  They are SO excited for Christmas this year....like, I'm talking crazy, don't-know-if-they-will-sleep-tonight excited.  Well, they're kids, of course they are excited right?  Well, they are 12 1/2 and almost 15....the Christmas mornings of Barbies, dolls and Easy Bake Ovens are gone.  Also, this will be the first year of their lives that their dad won't be here for Christmas.   I was worried that it would be an emotional and sad day for them.  Additionally, my mom will be at my brother's house.  My oldest daughter asked me if I was ok with that.  I said "Honestly, I am totally good with it...I have a feeling this will be a great Christmas."  Do you know what my amazing daughter said to me?  She said "Mom!  I was going to say the same thing!!  I think this is going to be the best Christmas ever..."

Fear of them being sad.....GONE

It was a few days later when my daughter posted the above photo in her Instagram feed.  It stopped me in my tracks.  This past year has been life-altering.  Not just for me, but for my girls too.  Last year was, hands-down, the worst Christmas of my life.  I was filled with anger, fear, sadness.  My girls could feel it.  Even though we included their dad in our day and tried for some normalcy, it was a charade.  I ended up drunk on mimosas, crying in the kitchen.  LOL  Not exactly a scene from a Hallmark card.  I said that day that I would never spend a Christmas feeling like that again....and I meant it.

I have learned and grown and done so much this year....it's hard to believe that it's only been a year... I am still the person that I was last year...but I'm so, SO much more now.  I'm well on my way to being the very best version of me.  I am so filled with gratitude and amazement every single day.  I can feel my energy vibrating at such a high level these days...it's so fascinating to witness, for me....My girls can notice it too.  One of the very best side-effects of this is that I see their growth and changes.  They bless and amaze and fill me with such joy, gratitude and pride every single day.   They are proof that yes, children can not only survive a parents' divorce, but can thrive and be healthy, emotionally adjusted, compassionate members of society.  Yes, a year ago, I was not as strong as I am now.  Yes, a year ago my girls saw me crying some days, and feeling fearful,  but we all walked through it together.



This time last year, things were completely different....and I'm so thankful for this path that I am walking and for those who have walked it with me, or helped to light my way in the dark patches.

Merry Christmas to you all.  My Christmas wish for you all is that you never let fear hold you back...walk forward...walk strong.